This blog is almost a waste of internet space.  Then again, I've seen worse!

It's where I'll electronically store my complaints about my current job situation.  

Read the whole backstory here on my about page.

Until next post...

Con el avance de la humanidad en este mundo ha avanzado, también,  la tecnología.  Mediante el conocimiento el hombre ha descubierto un sinnúmero de de cosas para facilitar su vida.  Hoy día uno de los temas  mas controversiales de los cuales más se habla es el de la energía.  El ser humano depende de la energía para sus actvidades vitales díarias.  Pero sucede que los recursos mas populares utilizados comunimente son no renovables.  Por otro lado existen otras alternativas, las cuales no son tan populares.  Estas alternativas, sin embargo, son renovables.  Entre ellas la energia eólica, hidraúlica y la que está en cuestión la energia solar, entre otras.  Pienso que es una buena alternativa mas aún en un país tropical como lo es Puerto Rico.  Aunque no es algo muy popular ha ido en crecimiento alrededor de la isla.  La gente poco a poco a creado conciencia y ha cambiado la forma tradicional en lo que  a estilo de vida se refiere.  En este blog, como ya han podido ver, podrán encontrar información sobre como ésta modalidad ha avanzado, informacion sobre lo que es, como funciona, beneficios, como ha funcionado para otras personas, como aplicarlo para si, entre otras cosas más.  El objetivo es el de aprender sobre una alternativa real y muy practica para cada puertorriqueño.

I live in the UK, in London to be precise. I was born abroad though and I'm British by naturalisation, not birth. I came to the UK in early 2001. I was UK-ed.

That's just to put things in perspective as what I'm about to write here is purely subjective and purely one of many blogs out there that no one reads. Given this disclaimer, I hope you will be gentle in your comments and take this blog lightly. I surely do so.

I will not share my name or any details about me and I'll stay an anonymous coward, but that's another feature I'm very upfront about.

All the best!

When I first decided to get back "out there" and put myself on the dating market looking back I think I was giving out the "don't f*ck with me vibe.  I was going out, looking cute but the guys were just not a-biting.  I suffer from it's written all over my face syndrome, so although I thought I was giving it the ole college try, my face read "keep it moving homie".

Then I met a couple of dudes that had just gotten out of or were still in relationships.  This was okay for awhile because I was in an emotional coma and I damn sure didn't want to deal with his.  But that got old fast.  At the end of the day I just want to be special to someone and have them realize it at that time and not once they've lost me...is that too much to ask???

So I took a small break and got into "girls just wanna have fun" mode.  I have the bestest friends in the whole wide world, I'm gonna stop focusing on getting a guy and just hang out and have fun with my friends because when I'm with them I'm happy and carefree.  That was and still is one of the most important ingredients of getting over it.

While in "girls just wanna have fun" mode, an unsuspecting suitor approached and I said what the hell.  We went on a couple dates, did a couple thangs (wink*wink) and it was cool I guess.  It wasn't what I wanted as he was physically unavailable more times than not but he kind of filled a void, so I do what I do best...I rocked with it.  I started to get into him a little more than I was comfortable with and got nervous, but still I rocked with it.  In retrospect I subconsciously did alot of things to sabotage that situation.  I regret that to this day but hey it's spilled milk.

So after sabotaging that situation to a point of destruction I put myself on punishment.  Yes I put my own self on time out.  I realized that I needed a little more me time to get my mind right before I go ahead and drive me and someone else crazy.  I'm on month 7 of time out and guess what I wanna go outside and play!!!!

I get nervous about things from time to time but I gotta tell you that I'm downright scared.  I'm afraid that I'm still not ready and if not a whole year later, then when?  Or will I ever?  I'm afraid that I'll still give off that vibe, that horrible noise that only dudes can hear that makes them run away, you know sorta like that dog whistle.  I'm most fearful, hell I'm sh*tting in my pants that I'm just damaged beyond repair.  I don't want a hole in my heart, I don't want the next dude to have a first aid kit handy.  I'm a bouncerback. I'm 1 Tough Cookie!

So let's go....this is my chronicle... 

Love.Live Life.Write.Progress.

It is supposed to be anonymous, because we are anonymous.  We are nobody special, but it still happened to us.

Something about me...  hrm.  I'm 24.  My mom is 63 this year.  She retired 3 years ago.  My father died 2 years ago from stomach cancer.

This whole thing started out so surreally.  I had been in out of town, visiting a friend.  My mom called me, and we talked.  I got home that afternoon, napped, and fixed dinner.  Shortly after dinner, I received a call from my mother.  She was in the emergency room.  She had gone because, she said, she was throwing up blood.  But there was no need for me to come, not to worry about it.

(My mom is notoriously like this, yet she frequently believes we have been killed in gang violence or snowstorms if she can't reach us for 2 hours)

Of course, we went.  Boyfriend and I were both worried.  Anytime a relative is in the hospital, you can't help but worry.  The hospital is a building of worry.  We both believed she had a bleeding ulcer because she was throwing up blood.  Not great, but not impossible.

When we got there, we found out the truth -- she was not throwing up blood, she was coughing up blood.  It had started that morning (why hadn't she told me when she called earlier?)  They admitted her to the hospital, did x-rays, and found a mass in her right lung.  It was probably cancer, they said, but it could be an infection.  My mother was a smoker of at least 30 years.  I did not have much hope that it was an infection.

It's strange the things you learn about people when they're in the ER.  I learned that night that my mother had tested positive for TB several years ago, but had never had anything done about it.

At any rate, they hospitalized her.  They asked if she was anxious, did she need Valium?  Did she need something to help her sleep?  Yes, she said, give me everything you've got.  She was not the least bit nervous, but I suspect we were all annoying her.  After all, she felt fine.  She hadn't expected them to admit her, she told me later.

After an hour or so with everyone in our family in attendance (literally.  we're from a small Southern town, no fewer than 13 people were there by the time they managed to get her into her room).

They put IVs into her, and wouldn't allow her to eat because tests would begin tomorrow.

She asked me to stay with her.  Sent home my stepdad, and my brother.  My boyfriend stayed at a local friend's house, and left the car at the hospital, in case they kicked me out (she was in a semi-private room -- you can't stay overnight if they admit someone else).

I spent a miserable night freezing on a chair and watching the Olympics.  The night was long and boring.  I didn't get any sleep because she frequently needed my help navigating to the bathroom while doped up on valium and ambien and dragging an IV which she frequently forgot was plugged into the wall.  She claims she didn't sleep well, but the nurse took her blood pressure several times and put on those leg cuffs they use without her stirring.

I remember watching the Olympics, and thinking on the unfairness of it.  That my mother was in the hospital, hacking up blood, while these young, healthy people did things that no one else could do.  I changed the channel.

My mother was in the care of a doctor she hated.  He had done a surgery poorly on my grandfather nearly 7 years earlier.  My grandfather also had lung cancer.

Regardless, she put up with him and his test, though she frequently made sure that staff were informed that she wanted to be transferred to another, larger, hospital for any surgeries.

They didn't manage to get a piece of the mass in her lung for a biopsy, but they did manage to get some of the fluid around it, and the tests came back clear.  She was discharged 2 days later, and she sought out a heart and lung specialist in another town.

This specialist did manage to get a piece of the mass during his biopsy, and it came back as negative for cancer.  She was scheduled for a PET scan and for a fine needle biopsy.  

The fine needle biopsy rendered the unhappy news -- she had lung cancer.  Third time's a charm, right?  It seems unfair that we should get so many negatives back only to have us knocked down by one positive.

Unfortunately, my mother is the worst doctor pesterer in the world, so I have no idea what kind, what the prognosis is, or what our plan is.  She says it has made it into a couple of her lymph nodes, but not into any organs.

She told me yesterday while I was at work, and I went home to cry and hope and pray and try to figure out my place in it all.  She does not want me to take time off of work and bother myself with helping her.  It is going to drive me batty not to go.   I feel like I have to.  I feel like I have no choice.

I am very afraid.  I went through this once with my dad.  This has made it no less surprising that my mom is not immortal.

Gameplay (parte I)

El 5 de septiembre ya estará en todas las tiendas el nuevo título de Square Enix creado por TriAce en exclusiva para XBOX360. Una carismática historia con gráficos de última generación, sistema de combates en tiempo real... dedicamos los próximos dos días a los primeros minutos de juego de Infinite Undiscovery.

Gameplay (parte II)

Gameplay (parte III)

Gameplay (parte IV)

Considering that this is my first post, I figured I'd introduce myself. Like I said earlier, my name is Jason. I'm from Portsmouth, Virginia and went to Churchland High School. Right now my major is University Studies, though I am thinking about changing it to English. I live in Pritchard Hall, which does not smell as some on campus would have you believe.

Well, that's really me in a nutshell, excluding the various delinquent endeavors and whatnot. I'm pretty sure anyone can comment on this blog so if you want, go ahead and give a little bio of yourself in a comment and maybe you can meet some new friends. Talk to you guys later:)

Two twenty somethings, one early, one knocking on thirty's door, looking for love and sex and all that is good and holy in the crazy mixed up world of half city/half suburb.

They began online dating to distract from boredom, to learn about themselves, to learn about love and the possibility that life could deliver everything we hoped it would. Both romantics, both cynical from past relationships that didn't work out.

This is the story.

My name is Nadienne (nay-dee-in) Saint Claire. I am currently in a rut, and I plan to get out of it by emptying out the contents of my heart, soul and mind in an effort to fill the rut all the way to the top so I am able to climb out. Because everything else isn't working. And no, I haven't tried everything. I've tried hoping, waiting, trying (a little) and whining. Fruitless, really. 

It's not that I haven't accomplished anything lately, just not enough. Not perfection, or anywhere near it. 

I want to feel vindicated.

I want love.

I want satisfaction.

I want the things that are impossible. Not, for example, a really good job doing what I love. More impossible. I want the most ungettable thing in the universe, whatever it is.

And that is the nature of my rut.

And that is my introduction.

The guys from Tokio Hotel are not on the Brazilian radios, but they’re rockin’on the internet. The group even won a voting online as the best band in the world! If you still don’t know them, you have no excuses to keep out of it.

Who: the twin brothers Bill and Tom Kaulitz (vocals and guitar, respectively), Georg Listing (bass) and Gustav Schäfer (drums).

Where: Germany

When: They got together in 2001, at the beginning the band was called Devilish. In 2005 they signed with a big GRAVADORA, and had the debut the first CD.

Why: they already released the albums Schrei in 2005 (and released in 2006 the English version, called Scream) and Zimmer 483 released in 2007 (the English version is called Room 483). The first single, Durch den Monsun, reached the top on the radios in Germany and Austria and the 8th in France. In 2007, the English version of this song (Monsoon) made it to the first place of Aisplaycharts from Israel.

To know: http://www.tokiohotelbrazil.com/

Trivial: Georg likes Oasis and Fall Out Boy, Bill’s favourite band is Green Day, Tom’s is Sammy Deluxe, Gustav’s is System of a Down and the Foo Fighters.

One time, I was sitting in the orthodontist's office, waiting for my son to be done with his appointment and a woman was running her business out of the doctor's waiting room.  She had her big catalog briefcase opened and her wireless ear thingy plugged in and was talking talking up a storm.  When she hung up from that call and dialed another number, I asked her if she would please take her business outside.  She got all huffy.  But she did go outside to make her calls...its not like it was raining or anything. 

This blog will consist of conversations I've overheard while minding my own business.  Conversations people have freely had in my earshot.  Conversations I couldn't HELP but overhear...we'll see how interesting it can be, shall we?

Essentially, the thought on your mind right now; is what you are meditating about. We actually meditate all the time and are affected in this process by body language, brain chemistry, speech patterns, interactions with people, the environ, art, media, childhood training, society, culture, peers, self-image, etc. The human brain never stops working and operates at many levels constantly. Hence, we are aware and meditating whether conscious, subconscious, unconscious or super conscious.

However, we are concerned with Meditation as a controlled process. Concentration of the mind is absolutely necessary for all of us. Just as one would tone the physical body through exercises, one has to train the mind through mental training, mental culture or mental drill. Meditation is a powerful mental and nervine tonic that gives the body soothing waves that exercise a caring influence on the organs of the body as well. It gives peace of mind by teaching you to detach yourself from troubling thoughts.

For those who care, I'm a senior at Miami University, majoring in Political Science, with a Co-Major in IMS (Interactive Media Studies).  I'm still not entirely sure what I want to do with the rest of my life, but I know that I'd like it to involve media of some sorts.

I'm sure that I'll probably post some of my non-class related things here, but I'll put a password on that stuff.  Of course, you can always ask for it and I'll provide you with the aforementioned password.  This is about it for now though.  There will be content soon, with educational feedback and pictures; because honestly, who doesn't like pictures?